Storms

I just got back from the grocery store.  I didn't go until 10PM.  Earlier, the parking lots were jammed and the lines at the gas stations were long, out on the street.  Seems like we live in the line of fire and full on panic has set in.  Schools cancelled for tomorrow.  I have to work, so the kids here will hunker down, though some think it's a great time to socialize and don't see the concern over driving.
I remember years ago the Blizzard of '78, back when Shelby Scott and Don Kent were our weather people.  Don always stayed in the studio.  He was like a dad.  Shelby was a lot like a mom. Shelby always got stuck out in high winds, swiping sleet and ravaging rain.  She was a hero.  I miss her.  I tell my kids about Don  and Shelby.  I grew up with them.  They were different than the celebrities we see on TV today.  There wasn't any glitz and glammor to their jobs.  They worked hard, and were paid fairly. 
They say this storm could be like that one, and by the look of the grocery story shelves it seems certain.  We were stuck inside for a week, at least.  Cars couldn't go anywhere. The snow took months to melt, piled high in parking lots.  There was no internet, no constant updates, no advance notice school cancellations.  So different from today. 
I often wonder where all this advancement has taken us.  For sure, a lot of it is good.  But I miss people like Don Kent and the amazing Shelby Scott.  I felt safe with them, even when the weather wasn't.  As long as Shelby was getting whipped around in the waves and we could see her head still bobbing ...we were all set.
Sometimes I can find someone else who remembers her and we trade stories of "remember when Shelby was ...,"  "remember when all the trees fell, and sure enough, there was Shelby on top of them all!"
I think whenever you lose someone, you not only beg for their return, but all the other things too that made up the fabric of their time with you.  You long for a return to the past and the things that made you secure.
Phoebe never saw Don or Shelby, but she knew about them, loved hearing stories about Shelby.  And I think Phoebe would have liked her job, would have been a good protege.  I miss having a storm looming and having Phoebe help me ready the troops.  If she was still here she'd have the shovels ready, tell me the strategy for the cars.  She'd be telling her sisters they could or couldn't go to their friends.  She'd be bossing us all around.  I could have walked through that store with her tonight and she would have laughed at all the empty shelves and wondered what people would do if they really lived without. 
I get to do lots of good and fun things with all my kids.  Simple funny things. Just this morning Mary Claire was horrified with me that I didn't know ducks don't get wet.  "Mom!  I'm six and I know that, you're a grownup and you don't know about the special oil on their feathers?  How could you not know that?"  She reported me to her big brother.  I was reprimanded. There's lots of laughter in this house ...and its good, our life is good.  But still, those times, those special little moments I shared with just her are gone, and I miss them.  She loved the outdoors, the power of nature and knew what it could do.  And she pushed her limits right up against it, always cautioning me. 
The Grand Canyon, the rivers and mountain ranges, valleys all were forged by the earth moving and shifting.  Their beauty is magnificent, extraordinary ...carved out of chaos and upheaval, undone by storms, only to settle on beautiful ...in time.
Is that what grief and loss, sadness and sorrow, suffering and pain does to the landscape of our soul?  Is that how God prepares us for a better, richer, more beautiful ...even magnificent soul?
Maybe.  I think in many ways, certainly.  And that's a gift.  Even still, I'd love my girl to boss me around a little bit, tell me what to do, get us all in line.  I'd love to yell to her outside "Hey Shelby, how's the weather?"
She'd likely tell me it was more than I could handle and she'd let me know when it was safe for me to come out. 
We'll ride out this storm ...without Don Kent, without Shelby Scott and without Phoebe.  And we'll arrive on the other side.