Handmaid VI

It's like holding your breath ... waiting for the passing.
But maybe things will change.  Prayers continue and we truly don't know the time or place ...and often not the circumstances.
I've combed through pictures in an effort to establish some type of order for my kids.  We have piles and piles of photographs.  I came across several of this special group of women, picnicing on the lawn one May.  We'd just prayed the rosary after our chaotic pilgrimage from parking lot to the beautiful statue of Blessed Mother.  The shock of bright red hair slowed me as I looked at the smiling face, just short of a giggle.  Little ones all around us.  It was indeed good to look at my friend and remember.
Sophie covers a lot of ground.  In a quiet, one on one way she spreads her love of God and urges everyone she meets to turn their face towards Him.  A few nights back I met with my two oldest friends.  One had flown in for a quick visit.  They'd met Sophie when Phoebe died and remembered her.  Her hair made her stand out, but what they recalled was her obvious faith, her devotion and confidence in God and her great love of the Blessed Mother.  She shared it with my two friends, searching for answers, so beautifully without passing any sense of judgment on them.  And sometimes, when we are trying to be faithful and good and right ...we can really come across in a way that makes people feel judged and convicted. I've felt that too sometimes ...and I know I've probably made others experience that with me, which I wish wasn't true.  But Sophie never makes people feel that way and which my friends voiced.
Sometimes people cover a lot of ground as a very public witness. Maybe some of you know of this woman,  Kara Tippets, who's own recent passing was expected, but evidenced such grace and trust in the eternal.
She's been a powerful witness to suffering and death.  And she'd voiced a beautiful plea to the young woman who chose her death this past fall.  Grab a cup of tea, and ponder, and read.

Losing Phoebe has been a painful and difficult walk for sure ...each day.  But faith offers an extraordinary opportunity to take each step forward ...whether towards life, or towards death ...trusting in the promise of eternity with Christ.
Death is never easy for those left behind, and suffering towards death is difficult and painful to watch.  But if we can wrap our minds just a bit, and open our hearts ...we don't have to be afraid.

Tomorrow, Palm Sunday, Christ enters Jerusalem, and for that one day, even the demons are subdued, unable to prompt and tempt people to hate Him.  Great praise and welcome are offered.  Palms are waved and laid on the ground in honor of his entrance.  ...and we know the story.  There is no Resurrection without the Crucifixion ...

Blessings to you, and please continue your prayers.

Annunciation

This beautiful feast day ...Feast of the Annunciation!  The day Mary said 'yes' to the angel Gabriel, inviting her to accept her call to give birth to Christ.  A mere human, she was infused with an understanding that she is nothing without God.  And she witnessed this when she said yes!
No one knows when they will die; no one knows when someone they love will die.
Isn't death a peculiar thing?!
The process of dying can be long and hard.  And it can take multiple forms.
Our friend Sophie is hard at work, soul work, as she approaches her time.  Keep praying.
We wait for updates, and we pray for her abundant family, for them to find peace.
My whole life is a struggle of saying yes or no to God.  That's really what it comes down to!
It's so easy to say 'yes' to the good things ...everything that affirms and confirms is welcomed with a great big 'yes'!
But the hard things, the undesired, the shameful, the disappointing ...those are so difficult to say yes to.  And I try every which way to not say yes, while convincing myself that I am indeed saying it.
Sophie said yes!  And she's shown so so many people how to accept and carry the task God offers to us.
This morning, I thought about this day, this feast.  And then I quickly thought about Sophie ...and all the yeses I got to witness her saying and accepting.
It's a hopeful day really.  It's really the day our redemption took physical form ...the day the Word was made flesh.  It's a beautiful day.
Please continue praying for Sophie and her family.
And I will offer prayers for you!

Handmaids V

Sophie's family have invited us to pray the Seven Sorrows of Mary rosary in union with them.

http://www.themostholyrosary.com/appendix1.htm

Each Sorrow is started with an Our Father, followed by seven Hail Mary's.

She is a beautiful witness in her willingness to accept and live out God's will for her.

Please continue to pray.  Thank you for each and every one offered.

Handmaids IV

One soul.  The power of one soul.
We are praying for a miracle ...the miracle is in our midst.  One soul.  Sophie's passion is for one soul ...at a time.
Her one soul, convicted by God's truth, is moving mountains.
One soul, one lost, lonely, proud, greedy, selfish (you name the sin) is why Christ died on the Cross.
To save one soul.  He died for just me ...just you ...just your enemy ...just one soul.  He died for all of us, but just each of us too!
Sophie is one soul ...but a soul driven by her passion to love and serve God and bring every other soul closer to or returned to God.
And that is the passion of one soul, the power of one soul.

Imagine a bunch of teenage girls, different groups, bumping into each other at a local Panera, miles away from the town Sophie lives, spreading the word there is Mass tomorrow for Sophie before school.  "I'll be there, I'll let everyone know!"
Imagine people who've never held a set of beads, pray the rosary for the first time, unafraid of not knowing how to.
Imagine people, away from God, witnessing men, women and children praising God, sad but joyful, knowing Sophie is a witness to Him
Imagine an ardent atheist, joining hands and pleading to our Heavenly Father for Sophie.
Imagine people, unaware, woken for the first time to learn of Our Lady of Guadalupe and her protection of the unborn.
Imagine someone, cynical about large Catholic families, witness nine children leading and praying the rosary, all of them like any other kid from any other family ...except for faith.
Imagine a home filled with shoes and backpacks, sporting equipment ...and a priest in a corner hearing confessions
Imagine ...what one soul ...has done!
Here is the miracle.  No matter what happens ...the miracle has happened.  One soul has grown faith beyond measure.
One soul has set an example for each one of us.  One soul ...that's all it takes to move mountains, to bring others back to God!

On this great feast of the silent Saint Joseph,  may we pray for his intercession.

Please pray!

Handmaids III

Keep praying ...
Sophie is still with us, and we are all praying for miracle ...
No matter the outcome here ... miracles are happening, conversions are happening, Truth is weaving its way into hardened hearts ...God is good, answering each prayer, responding to every opening.  May give each of us the grace to see His hand at work.
Tomorrow is the feast of St. Joseph, a quiet, unassuming man.  His intercession is powerful.  Ask for it!
Mass is being offered tomorrow for Phoebe at 6:30AM on this feast day.
Mass is being offered Friday for Sophie at 6:30AM.  A time when kids can go before school.  My daughter asked for this to happen ...
If you're in the area, join us if you can.  If you're in the area but can't join us, or if you're from out of the area, join us in prayer.
St. Padre Pio said the greatest weapon is the rosary.
He also said the world could survive without the sun more easily than it could without the Mass.

Offer a spiritual communion for your intentions and for Sophie

Act of Spiritual Communion

O Immaculate Queen of Heaven and Earth, Mother of God and Mediatrix of every grace: I believe that Thy dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, is truly, really, and substantially contained in the Most Blessed Sacrament. I love Him above all things and I long to receive Him into my heart. Since I cannot now receive Him sacramentally, be so good as to place Him spiritually in my soul.

O my Jesus, I embrace Thee as One who has already come, and I unite myself entirely to Thee. Never permit me to be separated from Thee. Amen. 

You remain in my prayers ...thank you for all of yours!

Handmaids II

Hi there!
If you have not read the post just prior to this one, please read it first, as this is its continuation.

So let me tell you about last night!
If you're not from around here (the Boston area) you may not know that we broke the snow record last night!  Which means, people traveled in droves to pray for Sophie in really awful weather along terrible roads.
People were undeterred and we parked in her neighborhood, tramped through the snow, all drawn and called to beg Heaven for prayers.
By the time we arrived, the house was packed shoulder to shoulder.  So we stood in her garage, just beneath her, joining hundreds of people praying the rosary!
St. Padre Pio said that the rosary is the greatest weapon!
We were lucky enough to find the shelter of the garage, while many others were out in the falling snow.  Something tells me no one minded a few snowflakes in their hair.
We would not see Sophie, and my daughter, Lucy would not see her friend, one of Sophie's daughters.
That was okay, because the sheer power of prayer and lit candles assured everyone that Heaven would hear us and was even present in our midst.
Sophie has nine children.  She is a wife, mother, nurse, friend ...and fierce promoter and defender of Christ.
The rosary has long been her weapon.
Years ago, when her first daughter headed off to a Catholic high school (the one I graduated from) she started a rosary group.  We heard the baby steps it took to get it going.  She didn't get much (if any) support from the administration.  But, true to Sophie's spirit, she plugged along.  Today that chapel, where she would pray the rosary, sometimes alone, in that school, was packed full of people praying for her. It took a long, long time, but she got that space filled with prayers to God.  And because of who she is, people, who normally wouldn't be praying ...are.  They are lifting their voices to God.  My daughter just came and told me they will be praying in that chapel every day after school for Sophie.  Well done Sophie!
Sophie has lots and lots of friends, and a large, extended family of people who love her.  And lots and lots of people have stories to tell about Sophie.
So it isn't my intent to assume a central position in her life ...but on a spiritual level she holds a central position in mine, along with my other mom friends who've prayed together over the years of my own motherhood!
As I drove home tonight, after visiting Sophie and her family, I called one of my friends, unable to make it to visit her dying friend.  The ride home was a remembrance of that group and that bond ...and what Sophie brought to our group.  My friend reminded me of some of the stories Sophie had shared, and I reminded her of others.  And though we remember different lessons we learned from the 'mom' stories she told, what we both remembered is Sophie's passion.
I got to spend time with Sophie tonight and tell her I love her and how blessed I am that she's been in my life.  Its been years since we all gathered every other Monday to learn about our faith and share our struggles.  But while the time of that group passed away, the bond of that group did not.  I could call any one of them, out of the blue, and it would be as if we had just visited an hour before.
Why is this group so central to my life, such a core of who I am and what my life is about?  Certainly I know other women of strong abiding faith, women who are an incredible witness to God's truth ...defenders of the unborn, spreaders of the rosary, vital members of their faith communities.  So why this group?
And it is a shared perspective from all of us that there is something unique.  Together we gave birth, we raised, we buried, we accepted, we forgave, we celebrated and we mourned.
When I pulled into my driveway, I paused for one more consideration.  I knew my girls would pepper me with questions about Sophie and her family.  These teenage girls of mine were central to that group too.  Memories are burned of moms and kids laughing and sharing, praying and picnicing.  What was it that bonded us so much?
And then it came to me as I remembered my friends comment.  "No one was afraid to be imperfect!"
That's it.  Together we didn't hide our mistakes, or concerns, over reactions ...we were ourselves.  All. the. time.  It was real.
Of course I've spent time with others in prayer, very meaningful and important.  But when I think about it, there was not much room to be imperfect as a group of people.  There were unrealistic standards silently imposed.  If you fell asleep praying the rosary you failed to say it.  If your kids were unruly during night prayer you hadn't taught them character ...yada yada yada.  And no one person imposes this, rather it can become a collective expectation (shh, no one is brave enough to utter our weakness!  including me!) In truth, no one is perfect, no matter how much we might pose!  But more, when we pose like that, we shut down the possibility of finding God ...why would we have to if we've already arrived!  I need God so so much! Because I am so terribly imperfect.  Just ask around!
So back to this group, we were all desperate ...and continue to be ...for God.  We start over every day! and with each other, we were and are not afraid to say it.  Oh, and our kids aren't perfect!  But they are all extremely lovable and bring tons of joy to us.  Even still, they make us want to pull our hair out, because growing up isn't a neat straight line!
In this group, anyone of us could have lost a child!  Any one of us might have lost Phoebe.  From them flowed a lifeboat of compassion that has been a big part of keeping me and all of us afloat.  They share the sorrow.
And then, Sophie, along with other moms from this group, picked the roses from Phoebe's grave, and it was Sophie who had them made into a rosary.  The rosary travels with me in my car.  Sometimes I can't pray the rosary and I just hold it.  It has been there with me now nearly four years.  Its a treasure to me; a link to where Phoebe is.
Tonight, I got to hold it with Sophie.  I told her it would be a relic since it was touching a saint!  Barely able to speak she responded "oh, I don't know about that!".  But I do.
Self deprecating, relentless, unyielding to the pressures of the world ...Sophie.
Please keep praying for her, for her family.
And I will remember you as well

Handmaids

In the traditional prayers of the Catholic Church (which are my preferred!) we pray for servants (men) and/or handmaids (women).  Now we all know this is so politically incorrect it'll cause tomatoes to fly through the air; but I don't really care, because things are a lot different in God's world than they are in the secular.  Hence the title!
I have several posts I never publish because I can't edit or polish them to how I want them to be.mostly, or just because.  So this one isn't going to be a draft.  It'll go from keyboard to publish, unedited, because it is that urgent.
In a recent post, just past Christmas, I wrote about a group of women who have been pivotal in my life before Phoebe died, but even more so after.  They are women I don't see regularly, but are a foundational piece of who I am and how I continue with the struggle to raise a Catholic family in a world quite openly hostile to that.  Without them, I probably would have packed up and left a long time ago.  And they are all handmaids for God.
One of the handmaids, my friend Sophie, is dying!  And she needs a miracle!
I'd seen her just before Christmas, and she described to me what seemed a miracle already.  She'd been very sick, and we were all praying ..and prayers were answered.  I saw and chatted with my old friend as we usually did ...racing the clock, covering many miles in a brief, unexpected meeting.  Together we gave thanks for what seemed a complete healing.
She recently took a sharp turn and she is in urgent need of prayer, and I'm trying to get as many people as I can to beg Heaven for her.
Tonight there is a candlelight prayer vigil at her home with her family.  Please join us!
Let me tell you a little about Sophie.
She is a warrior for Christ!  She is one who is never afraid to mention His name, never afraid to be alienated or mocked for defending him.  Everywhere she went, she spoke of Christ ...everywhere.
Her life is full, and she never asked for a stitch of attention or accolades.  Her calendar, her obligations were overflowing yet she always had time to listen, to share and to spread the possibility of God in your life.
She has red hair and a feisty passion that speaks of the reality of being a mother to a large family and striving to serve God through all of it.  If you went to her home, or she to yours you'd likely find a saint medal tucked inside a pocket.  She wants everyone protected.  In short, she's not a dabbler.
She spoke regularly of her imperfection, her need for God's forgiveness and mercy, and her need to seek His will at every turn.  She never considered herself above or beyond anyone.
Personally, she has helped me become the mother I am today with her humility and honesty and unrelenting trust and hope that God will guide us through.
At 7PM we will gather tonight.
Prayers are not bound by time!  So pray, any time you read this ...pray for her and for her family.
Knowing the life of this handmaid, there is spiritual power to be released regardless the outcome and that can all be used for the good to serve God, to change lives and bring souls closer to their Creator.
Let's all be united in prayer to beg Sophie's healing and in Thanksgiving for all the blessings God offers us.